Once again, i’s time for a holiday post. Whenever I post this message, it’s usually one of the most viewed posts of the year. Why? I’ll get to that in a minute.
It may not seem directly related to NeurOptimal® Dynamical Neurofeedback® – other than that training your brain makes most things in life easier. Benefits from having trained typically mean more ability to choose how to respond, rather than react in the same old way. (No one can get to us like our families can!) That makes a difference, perhaps especially at holiday time.
Back when I was first training as a psychotherapist, long before I had even heard of neurofeedback, I was the assistant to the leader of a workshop called How to Survive the Holidays. The leader was Jill Raiguel, MFCC, author of Alternative Healing beyond Recovery, a book that is chock full of the lifeskills many of us didn’t get to learn from our families. These skills can be particularly helpful during the holidays.
The holiday workshop was the best attended of all the many workshops we did, which told me how big a problem holidays can be for people. Since then, I’ve watched for opportunities to be helpful around the holiday season, including these annual posts.
The healthier your family is, the less difficult holidays are and the more enjoyable they are. The more dysfunctional your family, the more important it is to have a survival plan. Include as much of the following as fits for you. If you have additional ideas, please post them in the comments section.
How to survive the holidays
One last thing: Good self care may include saying no to family celebrations. Some family situations are just too charged or may have too much potential for re-abuse to make going appropriate. If that is true for you, instead create something celebratory with friends or set yourself up for something you would enjoy on your own. Or volunteer at a place that has meaning for you.
Please ask questions or make comments here. You’re also welcome to email me, including if you’re curious about how NeurOptimal® might be helpful with these kinds of situations and with life in general.
Catherine Boyer, MA, LCSW-R
New York Neurofeedback